I have an aversion to quitting.  Quitting just seems to be an easy way of getting out of a difficult situation.  This notion was probably instilled in me by my mother who would advise me when things got tough, “Oh Lisa, stop being such a baby. Think of this as a challenge.”  Mom was tough for sure!  Because of my upbringing, it has always been my belief that you will never fail unless you quit. As a result, I’ve probably stayed in certain situations for much longer than required. I assign adjectives such as ‘tenacity’, ‘persistence’, and ‘patience’ to any given matter that requires an extra boost of courage. I’d now like to revise this philosophy.

For the past five years or so, I worked very hard on a particular client relationship.  Dragonfly prides itself with cultivating relationships with its clientele and this client was generally pleasant enough.  I had respect for his experience and his work.  The client also could be very difficult.  Micro managing and projects coming in to my studio at the 11th hour were becoming a lifestyle.  The account was challenging on a monthly basis but clearly no reason to quit.

After four years or so, things became much more difficult.  I found myself all too frequently on the receiving end of verbal outbursts and fists slammed upon the table top.  I witnessed my design work crumbled up and thrown into the trash.  I worked through holidays, weekends, and late into the night because of some “graphic design emergency”.  I postponed vacations and often got phone calls at 7am.  Rarely did I hear a simple ‘thank you’ but my invoices were always paid on time.  Still not a reason to quit?

Over the past week, when desperately hoping to enjoy a Thanksgiving Holiday with my family… in came but yet another series of requests for work to prepare for Art Miami Basel in December.  Despite having spent several weeks already assisting this client in preparing his website and marketing materials… micromanaging was the name of the game and many revisions and additional requests for work were made.  The client was stressed and now so was I.  Unpleasant emails were exchanged several times a day.  As I sat at my desk that holiday weekend, miserable and sad, I began to draw what I titled “I Hate Who I Am When I Am With You.”  Now there was a reason to quit the account.  The whole situation was awful and despite the lies, the threats, the demands and the civil disobedience, it was sad.  Ending a relationship of any kind is emotional… it’s a divorce.

Monday morning I completed all work required, penned my resignation and my reasons for doing so. Relief flooded over me like a warm bath.  I’m sure my ex-client felt the same way as I don’t think people who are nasty are happy about their behavior.  During that same week, I received an invitation to join the AIGA CT Board.  I accepted. My long standing, non yelling clients came through my door with reasonable requests for work.  I made phone calls and reached out to old clients and possible new ones.  Positive things were replacing the negative.

I learned a valuable lesson.  Sometimes quitting is exactly what needs to be done.  Sometimes quitting allows us to move on in creative and exciting directions.  It makes room for new opportunities and allows us to look at life with fresh and rested eyes.  At this point, I am happy and thrilled about my future, my work and my clientele.  Never ever will I allow someone else make me hate who I am when I’m with them…and if you should find yourself in this type of situation, neither should you.  Go forth and plant positive seeds in the universe.

Have you had a similar experience?  How did you handle it?  Share your thoughts with a comment below.

I  recently had the pleasure of interviewing Chief Operating Officer, Jim Joseph, and Executive Director of Marketing, Publicity and Design, Ingar Forland, at Globe Pequot Press for an upcoming INK article.  GPP is the publisher for the imprint skirt! which recently released Karen Karbo’s The Gospel According to Coco Chanel – Life Lessons From the World’s Most Elegant Woman. There’s been plenty of brouhaha over Coco Chanel these days.  A recent revival of movies, books and buzz have paid homage to the great Chanel and so it was with a certain amount of glee that I obtained a copy of Karbo’s book.

Like the little black dress (invented by non-other than Chanel herself), Karbo’s little book is a pleasure to behold.  The diminutive book fits nicely into your bag for take along reading. The cover is smooth and luxurious.  Fashion illustrations by Chesley McLaren provide the eye candy.  But this book was not written as just another biography of the fashion designer.  This book provides a guide for the modern woman who wishes self sufficiency and empowerment the Chanel way.  With wit and humor, and even a bit of that same snarky Chanel attitude, Karbo’s text provides a series of checks and balances for women navigating life’s many turns.  I read it with greed.  I might even read it again.  Chapters listed as “On Style”, “On Surviving Passion”, “On Embracing the Moment”, “On Money”, and “On Living Life on Your Own Terms” while fun caused me periods of self reflection.  “How do I measure up?” I asked myself, “How can I be better?”  Karbo provided some answers.

Through the pages of The Gospel, we do learn snippets of Chanel’s life… her rags to riches background, the compulsive lying which created her mystique, and her success with and final rejection of love.  But the biography portion of Chanel’s life is not the focus here.  It’s the advice that makes it different and relevant. I especially recommend this book for my fellow ladies who are designers, artists, workaholics and creative entrepreneurs.  Those who enjoy humor and escapism reading with good dose of savoir faire will also not be disappointed.

The Gospel According to Coco Chanel – Life Lessons From the World’s Most Elegant Woman can be obtained from the Globe Pequot Press website and from Amazon, or Barnes and Noble.

Karen Karbo is also the author of How to Hepburn, Lessons of Living From the Great Kate.  Her writings can also be found in Vogue, Elle, Esquire, and Redbook. She lives in Portland, Oregon.

Today, October 3, Soundwalk, in joint venture with Clicmobile, will premiere iPhone applications for three Paris audio tours during Nuit Blanche, an annual all-night international arts festival.  For this occasion the Soundwalk iPhone app will be available for free, on October 3 only.

More info at http://nuitblanche.soundwalk.com

Download the different Soundwalk iPhone Paris tours directly on iTunes, available in French and English.  Saint-Germain-Des-Prés, Belleville, and Le Marais iPhone Soundwalks

I recently took a three week vacation.  I know, right?  Intervention was required to save me from myself because I have a bit of a problem being a workaholic.  Normally my vacations consist of a long weekend or maybe a 10 day stint where I find myself sleeping for the first 72 hours, then adjusting to the idea of the vacation, and by the time the vacation is over… I’m finally getting the hang of it.

This recent retreat was a staycation (as they call it) and I had around me my loved ones who wholeheartedly supported my “taking it easy.”  Battered and bruised with chronic neck stress and bags under my eyes, I took some time in Boston and then came home for the remainder of my vacation where my family pampered and spoiled me, fed and watered me, and let me nap in the September sunshine.  It was pretty terrific.  By week two, I was beginning unwind.  By week three I noticed a decided change in attitude and physical well being.  My goodness, I hadn’t felt this good since 2006!  I felt clear.

Back in the old days before I had children or a business to run, I would indulge in what I called my “Annual Weekend Read-A-Thon.” Over the course of some weeks (or months) as I went through my life, I would collect books, magazines, brochures, pamphlets etc and stack them in a pile by the side of my bed. When the pile became unwieldy, I planned a Read-A-Thon. Over this past weekend, unwilling to venture out into the hot and humid 90+ degree out of doors… I reinstated the weekend Read-A-Thon.

What is social media? Are you using it? Here are some amazing facts and figures as to why you might not want to dismiss the social media revolution. As freelancers, artists or designers can your business afford to overlook these opportunities? Have a look.
Found via Debbie Millman – President of AIGA

While meeting with a client on Friday, he showed me one of his new toys… The Buddha Board.  I was so taken with this thing I had to share it here.  So simple and yet brilliant.  The Buddha Board allows artists, designers, and even those shy about ever sharing their creations to draw on a special board with water.  As you paint, the board darkens and then after about 15 minutes your creation fades and disappears.  It’s perfect when you aren’t concerned about creating “product” and seek a little inspiration or relax time.  Buddha Board comes with the board, a bamboo paint brush and water tray.  Very Zen!

The Buddha Board website explains like this:

You simply paint on the surface with water and your creation will come to life in bold design. Then as the water slowly evaporates, your art will magically disappear leaving you with a clean slate and a clear mind – ready to create a whole new masterpiece. Buddha Board is also environmentally friendly and will last for years with proper care. Allow yourself to let go and not be concerned with each outcome – live for the moment.

Visit the Buddha Board website or the board can be purchased from amazon.com

Like this post?  Please leave a comment or share with a friend.

Awhile back, I wrote about Designing Your Perfect Day.  Visualizing your perfect day can help clarify goals and dreams and then better position us to make real plans toward living the kind of life we have always wanted. This would serve as our model for the day of days. Everything in its place. Perfect environment. Perfect people. Perfect food. I, however, was having some difficulty imagining my perfect day. Try as I might, I just couldn’t get past breakfast!